Try: Changing Your Body Temperature

Henri Matisse, Seated Woman, Back Turned to the Open Window, 1922.

I've found that when I'm stuck in cyclical thinking, or just feeling stuck changing my body temperature actually makes a difference. A hot bath is one way to go, but lately I've been finding a cool breeze is often what I need most.

Try removing a layer of clothing or opening a window when you're stuck in your thoughts. It’s simple, but it actually helps bring you back into the moment. The goal is getting grounded. Changing your body temperature helps.

If this experiment works for you, hit the heart (no login required) to let others know they should give it a try!

Try: Using the Phrase "Don't Compare"

Since you're a human being and you're alive in 2017, I'm guessing you're aware of the "comparing yourself" problem. You know, the situation where a person wastes time worrying that their neighbor/friend/coworker has a better life / things more figured out / a better job than they do?

It's a cancerous thought problem, and this experiment is meant to tackle it head-on.

You're hearing this from the frontlines: it's possible to dent the "comparing" problem.

Change the habit.

I've lessened the amount that I compare myself to others in the past three years by building on my mental habit. At first it took brute force. Over time it has gotten easier and more natural. Here's how it works: If I feel my mind start to bend toward comparison, I literally say the following two words to myself,

DON'T COMPARE.

 I then think about how I couldn’t live like others even if I wanted to.

Keep it simple, build the muscle.

It can be very hard to put theoreticals into action. That's why this experiment really is just about saying these words aloud to yourself:

“Don’t compare.” “Don’t compare.”

I hope this experiment works for you! Sending you good, non-comparison thoughts.

If this experiment works for you, hit the heart (no login required) to let others know they should give it a try!

The Designer Who Traded His Camera Phone for a Pad of Paper

Shridhar Reddy Wanted To See More Clearly.

From a John Muir Laws tutorial.

Shridhar Reddy was a colleague of mine. We always had great conversations at lunch. Afterward, I’d often find a mysterious book on my desk on a wide array of topics — from Winnebagos to UX design to nature journaling.

Shridhar mentioned he had stopped taking photos and started drawing on his daily runs. I wanted to know more. The shift felt like it could help others. It signaled creative regeneration. I asked if I could interview him on the topic, and he generously agreed not only to answer my questions, but to share his illustrations as well.

Me: You’re a designer and you’re married to a designer, so it might follow that you’ve always been interested in illustration. Is that true?

Shridhar: Yes. I actually was very attracted to my then-girlfriend because she was such a good illustrator. Growing up in India art, illustration and design were far in the periphery of approved educational pursuits. It was neither encouraged or even known as a hobby then.

Our Bay, illustrated by Shridhar Reddy.

When I graduated from design school in rather late in life, I had this gnawing complex that I couldn’t really be a good designer because I couldn’t draw and sketch like I saw some of my American class-mates do. Worse, thanks to a rather fatalistic attitude inherited from my culture, I also was convinced that I wasn’t quite “born” with that talent, therefore there seemed no point in learning how to draw. It took about a decade of living in America, before I finally realized that any limitation of skill was completely in my head.

Harbin Hot Springs. Illustration by Shridhar Reddy

Therefore, when I walked in to Argo cafe in Chicago on a first date to to meet a girl who is now my wife, I was absolutely struck to find her at a table doodling away in a little black moleskine. She showed me the sketches, and I saw a sunny little glimpse of our future. Surely, she could teach me to draw?

Me: Are you good at drawing? Be impartial. Most people think they’re terrible at it, but most people aren’t designers.

The Memory of Trees. Illustrated by Shridhar Reddy.

Shridhar: Honestly, I think I am mediocre, with a good chance at getting better. It is merely a matter of practice based on good inspiration and some tutelage.

If there is one fact about drawing that I would want anyone to know — it is that we are all equally good at drawing. It is our formal education system and our circle of friends/teachers/coworkers who ultimately might be the biggest inhibitors of our drawing. It has been lamented over and over that all kids are equally good at it until their middle school years and those that got good at it were those that continued drawing through their high school years in an unstructured way. The rest — just quit.

Me: How did you first come across the idea of nature illustration?

Shridhar: Landscape photography was my first introduction to the visual arts. It was a perfect complement to my motorcycle travels and i ventured forth with a camera tucked into my motorcycle luggage into many exotic landscapes that beckoned. However, photography is also equipment intensive, with a never-ending wish list of gear and gadgets. Over time, I noticed myself shooting too many photographs, too quickly, in too little time. I was not really absorbing the scene around me, just hoping for a few keepers, a time-stamp rather than a moment. It was the equivalent of fast-food.

It was after giving up on photography for a few years that I noticed an urge to get back into nature, but with the intent of simply recording it into my memory, and not the camera’s. I was delighted that by doing a quick water color sketch of a scene I was completely free from many of the rules of photography (light, color, composition). Here was a way to invent my own landscape, and yet never forget the landscape that I was in at that moment.

Me: You told me a little about John Muir Laws, whose gif I’ve put at the top of this piece. What is special about him?

Shridhar: John Muir Laws (may his tribe increase) is a rare individual in this day and age — his entire life’s mission is to spread the skill of nature journaling as a way to celebrate and preserve nature. He is a born teacher — no skill is too small for him to explain, and no subject is too difficult for him to deconstruct. Like a magician explaining his wizardry, he breaks down sketching into small, finite, easily learned and practiced skills. And of course, all of his teaching is free for anyone who comes to his lectures and nature walks.

From John Muir Laws’ incredible website.

Me: How does drawing differ from photography (apart from the obvious)?

Shridhar: Both are art forms, but for me, the differences that matter are:

1. Temporal: A photograph takes less than a second to take. A sketch takes a minimum of 20–30 minutes. When you spend that much time with a single subject, you are guaranteed to never forget it ever. To this day, I walk around the park in my neighborhood and greet some trees like old friends because I sketched them.

“When you spend that much time with a single subject, you are guaranteed to never forget it ever.”

2. Word and image: Photographs force words out of the image. At best, words survive as a caption and a line of description beneath. But with sketching, text is easily an integral part of the picture. I freely scribble my thoughts. They are a living part of my design. Sometimes as a scrawled texture, other times as a bold statement or quotation — therefore, a living journal of what i see and what i feel.

“[Thoughts] are a living part of my design.”

Me: Do you think this is something you’ll be able to continue and if so, what do you think will keep you going with it? What brings you back to nature illustration?

Shridhar: I definitely hope to continue this new found skill. As with many skills, it is essential to find the right sources of inspiration, the right venue to share it with and the right teacher/people to keep the inspiration loop tight.

Nature illustration is only a form of sketching. It could be any kind of sketching that i will be doing. A project that I am currently working on is to sketch all of my son’s favorite toys. Another project is to draw all the trees in McLaren park that grab my attention everyday. Yet another project is the idea of the 10 minute landscape painting on small sizes. There is no end to how many reasons there are to pull out the paper and pencil.

“Flowers that I’d bought for Jess 10 days ago.”

Me: Last question. Do you think I should try it? Seriously, my drawing skills are jokily bad. Like worse than my daughter at age 3 bad. What could I get out of it?

Shridhar: You practice meditation, right? Then you are ready to start drawing. It is by far the easiest and most rewarding form of meditation. The parallels between the two practices are striking — an intimate space, a mind focused intently for 20–25 minutes, the body relaxed and aware and at peace. The only difference is that at the end of a sketching session, you have a visual record of your practice on paper. Imagine flipping that journal and re-living each meditation?!

From Danny Gregory’s published art journal.

I highly recommend any of Danny Gregory’s books on drawing. He doesn’t teach drawing, but convinces you to try it. I leave it to him to convince you that the last thing you need to think of is how your drawing looks. What matters is that you felt compelled enough to mark paper with pen. Do it for a few minutes daily, and you have a practice, and not too much time later, you will surprise yourself that you actually happen to like what you sketched. And oddly enough, it doesn’t matter then either.

Me: I am inspired by you and this practice. Thank you for sharing it with me and others, Shridhar!

Try to: Say 100 Things You Are Grateful For

This comes from the ancient Jewish practice of Mussar, the study of character-building. I first learned about Mussar from Tiffany Schlain (Webby Award founder) when I saw a film she created as part of a 2014 project she entitled Character Day.

The Making of a Mensch from The Moxie Institute. The 100 Blessings concept starts at 4:53.

The idea is very simple. From the film's transcript:

For example, say you want to increase your sense of gratitude, which there's so much research today saying that if you feel more grateful you're gonna be healthier you're gonna have more mental strength and you're gonna sleep better.

There's a practice on gratitude based on the Jewish tradition of a hundred blessings a day. My good friend Armas first taught me about it. Every day you say say a hundred blessings. Everything from waking up first thing in the morning to the big moments to the little moments. Even when you go to the bathroom (that's the Jewish way).

100 blessings every day. Do I say them? I try.

At the end of the day as you're going to sleep instead of looking at your screen close your eyes and think about all those moments all those things are grateful for.

I love the image they chose to represent the imagining of the Day's gratitudes at sleep.

If this experiment works for you, hit the heart (no login required) to let others know they should give it a try!

Try: Mixing A Nature Soundtrack

Shack rain, calm fire, and beach rushing water, though unlikely, could be your actual soundtrack.

I like Moodil because you can wait for the bad weather in your head to pass by creating your own mood-perfect nature soundtrack.

I tend to like the meadow nighttime sounds (as shown by the moon and stars) along with a calm fire and thunderstorm. But who cares what I like? Experiment your way into a relaxed background while cooking, working, or falling asleep.

I use the desktop version but Moodil is an app, so it's meant to be used on phones.

If this experiment works for you, hit the heart (no login required) to let others know they should give it a try!

Guide to the Language of Beautiful Voyager

Think of this as a wiki.

Some of these terms came from Meredith (founder of BV), some from articles or tv shows, and many from the BV Slack group. Understanding the lingo helps understand the concepts, so that's why we're creating one place to be able to refer to it all.

Beautiful Voyager = Anyone who joins Bevoya.com in any way. It could be by putting a lighthouse on the map, joining our Slack group, or just checking in regularly. 

Overthinker = You think deeply about the world. A responsible researcher, you're seek answers. You've been told you "think too much." You're sensitive and empathic. Physical pain is a sign that thinking has become overthinking. 

Vulnerability Hangover = The rush of regret you feel after sharing your weakness with others or the lingering awkwardness you feel after trying something new that revealed a hidden or surprising weakness.

Wondy-win = The daily wins that make us stronger. Wondy is short for wonderful.

Mapagize = When two people apologize at the same time because they are people pleasers.

Pickle = BV code word for something we don't like. Usage - "That comment is a real PICKLE." Useful as replacement to swearing.

Dead Sea Scroll (DSS) = the phenomenon when you spend hours upon hours, scrolling through social media. Social media is the dead sea. And scrolling is the scroll.

Wave the Flag! = BV slogan for when you need to talk or let something off your chest. Usually, people come onto Slack and shoot a flag emoji. Then, the community comes together!

Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD) =  An umbrella term used by the mental health industry for a host of underlying anxieties. If you have GAD, you might be a perfectionist who is concerned about details and wants to please others. 

The Wave =  A concept Meredith uses to describe the physiological experience of anxiety. Riding the wave is key to feeling better.

Special thank you to wordsmith Mina Demian. 

If you'd like to edit the wiki, let me know and I'll give you a login.

Try: Giving Your Inner Critic a Cookie

I was telling the brilliant minds of the Beautiful Voyager Slack group about how I stumble over certain kinds of small talk. One of members' great suggestions is this experiment. I'm going to try it when I feel the same thing come up the next time in small talk.

The Triggering Situation

You are asked a question, and for whatever reason it has you second-guessing yourself. Example:

RANDOM PERSON: "Hey, how's that new guitar-playing hobby going? Are you sticking with it?"

YOU (internally): Uh-oh. I'm not sure how to answer this. I haven't been practicing as much. I mean, I do still like the guitar but...

YOU (externally): "Yeah, mumble, good, mumble."

Enter the Cookie

This is where the experiment begins.

That first moment of internal angst? That's your critic talking to you. This is the moment you shove a cookie in the critic's mouth.

Here's how you do it.

RANDOM PERSON: "Hey, how's that new guitar-playing hobby going? Are you sticking with it?"

YOU (internally): Oh, hey critic. Yeah, I know we're still figuring out the whole guitar thing. Thank you for trying to help out and make me feel better, but I don't need you to protect me. Here you go. Please eat this cookie and sit down, critic. We'll talk later."

YOU (externally): "I love the guitar! Could always be practicing more."

My Slack group friend broke it down this way by saying that to deal with the critic, we need to:

• acknowledge the good the critic brings

• how does that make you feel

• what do you NEED

• make a critic request (The request can be...I need you to eat your cookie now, and we can talk later).

I'm gonna give this one a try and report back. You should too!

If this experiment works for you, hit the heart (no login required) to let others know they should give it a try!

How Anxiety Feels as a Teenager in India

The Manisha/Shahpura lake of Bhopal. Photo credit: Pratigya 

Dear Anxiety,

If I could say three words to you, I would undoubtedly say 'please stop'. You silently laugh that I can't count but honestly I'm too tired to give a second thought to something that's been on my mind for far too long now. I've been meaning to say this for quite sometime, or maybe since the day we started and I was scared to say this until now, but I don't think this is working out.

Pratigya

I think we need to part so you might as well find another host to feed upon. You seemed nice in the beginning; you taught me things that I could not have managed learning on my own, but now I want to do this alone. And oh yeah, I do have to appreciate how you pointed out to me that enjoying one's own company is good for a change; but I see through you, you wanted to keep me all to yourself, didn't you? Funny how not too long ago I used to laugh at girls who could not see that they were clearly being used, and now life has come a full circle and I silently curse myself to have been so blind to see that ours was never a fair truce.

The Manisha/Shahpura lake, here in Bhopal. Photo credit: Pratigya 

So please, dear anxiety, just stop. Stop messing with my head so much. Stop interfering in matters that have no need for you. Stop sneaking up on me on random days and whispering 'hello'. Stop dragging me down into lanes where you and your friends hang out. Stop using me like your personal ruse.

You've done more than enough, so much so that I have forgotten where the line used to be. You've succeeded in your plan and thrown me off my feet. You've pushed me into alleyways that I don't recognize. You've turned me into a being that's more of a monster and less of a human. Like a skilled puppeteer you've fooled me into destroying myself such that I'm the only one left who can be blamed and chastised.
So, tonight, not for the first time but surely for the last I order you to leave because I've finally come to accept a long known fact, that it's you and not me.

(Not) Yours (anymore),

T.Q.M.

Pratigya is a 19-year-old undergrad commerce student in Bhopal, Madhya Pradesh in India. She originally published this post on Medium.

This is where Pratigya lives.