A Poem Illustrating My Experience with G.A.D.

poetry for anxious people

Hi, I'm Melissa. I'm 22, a native of Chicago, a writer and a strong advocate for mental health, specifically G.A.D. and depression. This poem was inspired by the prose and style of poetry by Rupi Kaur and is dedicated with love, support, and solidarity with those who have or are learning to live with anxiety...just like me. Much thanks and love.

Read more of my work here

Maskara

it paints my lashes

black

to showcase them into the light

it lengthens their blonde edges

so my eyes can seem

open

awake

and here again

so that you’re distracted

by these long whimsical lashes

and unable to see behind them that

my right eye is

twitching

faster than the beat of my own heart

 

the twitch unapologetically takes host to my left eye

but this is one war when

changing sides

doesn’t make a difference

 

it paints my flushed cheeks

black

streaks them

with too many Mississippi rivers to count

drops of black leading the mouth of each river

over the hills of my cheek bones

down into the valley of my lips

to reveal the strength my mind has

over my body

over me

I can’t see out of my right eye

blurry

twitching again

faster than before

 

my favorite beauty product

it makes me feel beautiful

it’s all I need

and yet

I question every morning

is it even worth putting on

because I don’t know

if it will last until noon

 

they say

makeup can highlight

your best features

they don’t say

makeup can shine a spotlight

on the features

of your face

and hide

what’s stirring inside

behind it

- G.A.D.